Domestic abuse or violence refers to patterns of behaviors within relationships that are used to gain or keep power over another member of the family. Typically, it is a spouse against a spouse or a parent against a child. In some situations involving the elderly, it may be a child against a parent.

Domestic abuse or violence can be physical, emotional, sexual, or psychological. Domestic violence behaviors are typically meant to scare, physically harm, or control a person. Common behaviors include name calling, threat making, manipulation, humiliation, blaming, and similar violations. Other behaviors associated with domestic abuse or violence may involve the aggressor attempting to isolate the victim from others or monitoring the victim’s behavior.

In many cases, individuals who experience domestic abuse or violence are hesitant to report it to the authorities out of fear. Yet, for some, it is the hope the abuser will change their behavior. While possible, this rarely happens, and in most cases, the behavior gets worse over time.


What to Look for in a Therapist

In most cases, it’s best to work with a therapist who specializes in domestic violence and abuse. If there is not one available, that is not to say other mental health professionals cannot be helpful. Family conflict psychologists, trauma and abuse therapists, and relational therapists all tend to have a background in, and experience with, domestic violence. Establishing trust is a critical component of the client-therapist relationship. You are looking for a therapist who calms you down or someone whom you can talk to eventually without feeling the need to self censor yourself.